Abba, today I thank you for these your children, these who have offered themselves to you and your service, those who have sacrificed and those who have shed tears as they are laboring for you in what seems to be an endless journey of limits, shortage, being misunderstood, and yes, overlooked. We serve at your pleasure, and hope you find pleasure in us. We didn't call ourselves, you called and we answered, often with loud, YES!!! Only to find ourselves wanting, what we don't have, or being who we're not, and even here you are helping us become thankful for who we are. It is confusing, and I often don't 'get it???' "Why are you disquieted my soul . . ." Ps. 43:5. Thank you for your help and comfort. Thank you for creating me as you have. Thank you for working within me and never giving up on me. Thank you for resources I don't have or see, for help I don't know is around the corner or bend in the road. Thank you for those who are praying for me, and chose not to let me know they are.
Lord, I'm just a man, and I'm not always sure I know what you're up to or even how close you are to my and our situation. Thank you for this awareness that you are aware of my need and you are working to 'save me," as you did Peter as he sank beneath the waves. Thanks for being here, now, today and not far or distance from me.
I bless you for a goodness I don't deserve, a mercy I didn't expect and a grace that embraces me, even as I run away in moments of fear. Thank you for making me your own, and reminding me of your love for one just like me. I am a child, not a man, I am broken but you're healing me, I am a sinner, but you've redeemed me; I am foolish, but you've made me wise, I am so needy, but you are filling every part of that need with your own self. Thank you for being present, in this moment, and for those moments I will face this week; for those I can't see coming and don't expect. Even there you are. Help me to trust you and depend so much upon myself, my ability, my intellect,
Jesus, I need you, and somehow you want me to a part of great and grand outcome I don't see understand or 'get.' Yet you call me to be you Son, Servant and partner in the redemption and renewal of this piece of the world. Lord, don't let me miss it, the thing you want and doing in this moment. I am so often wrong in so many things, but I love you and somehow I'm sure I make you laugh as I struggle, trying to 'figure out' how I am to do, what you know only what you can do. Thank you Jesus for loving me as you have, and continue too. You are an AMAZING GOD!!!
So I ask, what is it you want to do and accomplish this week, that I can't, even with my best effort? Where is that situation that is yes, frankly impossible without you hand being involved? Thank you for being more and more than enough! Thank you for a strength I don't have, for a faith that seems spent and not I'm empty. Could this be the place you wanted to bring me too. Where you are the Shepard and I shall need of nothing???" Is this the valley of Baca (Ps. 84:6) where you make it a place of refreshing springs? I say thank you for that I can't see or understand, this place where I am confused and uncertain, where I 'feel' alone and without comfort, where the pain of the moment seems to be my only friend and companion. Yet, in that 'secret' place of my heart, I know You are here!" THANK you for the struggle, It is here that you draw me closer to yourself, and comfort my heart. I love you Abba, not just for what you do, but who you are. I bless you for blessing, I don't deserve or could earn, I honor you for your gift of salvation unearned and undeserved, for refreshing my spirit by the presence of the Holy Spirit in this moment, this day and this week, AMEN!!!
Love ya,
T.A.B.
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