Sometimes what comes pouring out is surprising

As I prayed this morning, the following came pouring out. Why, not even I can answer that. Yet I believe prayer must be honest and not always polite! The Psalms were written from the hearts, souls and yes, pain of the writters; if you've never read them as written in The Message, by Eugene Peterson, I suggest you get a copy and read them, they are AMAZING! So here's the prayer I prayed, which surprised even me.

Father, no more polite and cuties prayers:

Father, I thank you for a new year and for this (and every) new day.

What lies before us is greater then what is behind us. You where in my (our) past and you are very much in my (our) present.  There is nothing I am facing or will face that you are not present in and for. Grant me courage to do what I can and allow you to take charge everything else.

May we find way to bind together with those few men and women who dare to find time for each other. Who make room from those who aren’t like them on various levels, yet love you. We are in this thing you call the church together no matter how close or far apart we are. By your grace I dare to believe that you want us to find the one thing in each of these lives that causes me to stretch beyond my comfort zone and that will bring you glory.

Bless these my brother and sisters who risk so much for your purpose. Oh God break me, that what is broken you can begin to mold into your own idea of what I and your church must be. The division are so deep, the divides so cavernous we dare not try to reach or cross, yet you said we are to love one another, you call us to be ‘brothers and sisters’ even to those who are estranged from me, and who do so willing. Forgive my anger and yes, anger which I hold silently within and burns a hole in my spirit. May I love each of these as you love me; the love and grace you’ve given me, must be reproduced within me but that is wholly of your Spirit.

Yes, I am a new creature, if I dare to be. Yes, I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me, if I allow you to; Yes, I need you, but do I want you too? These I share this prayer with are part of my (your) ever expanding family. These are they for whom you died Jesus; and I dare to hold them at arm’s length because of the pain I feel in my own heart. Forgive me Jesus!

I thank you that you see me, I’m not invisible to you; you don’t and won’t ignore me or pretend I have no value. You value each of us as your children, here in my heart you dwell, not in part, but all of you which makes each of us present with you in this moment.

Bless us this year to accomplish what you want; your purpose for your glory, this I ask in the mighty Name of Jesus, AMEN!

Those of you who dare, or have the courage, i'd like to hear from you after you've had a moment to pray with me. Love ya, T.A.B.